Forgiveness

When we do a mistake in our life and seen its consequences, we have to learn from in it. But instead we repeatedly deny the lesson and doing the same mistake then it will lead to a life time error.  Even many of them hurt me sometimes; when time moves on I can forget and forgive all completely. But I can’t forgive myself for  falling prey to the same mistake again and again in my life. I thrown away what was precious in my life , now everything has been gone. Things happened is happen. I can’t change any or deny it. God shown me right path many times but I had always chosen the wrong lead knowingly and I went on it far long, but when I realize my mistake with my heart and it becomes too late that all the doors are closed. Now I feel for it everyday, sometimes I can’t accept myself thinking of how much untrustworthy things I did and had a meaningless and useless life. The thing which hurt me most is that when I was wrong my parents tried to teach me good in their own strictly way but I was too stupid dumb and ignorant to their words. I made them suffer but all they thought was that their daughter to lead a well disciplined life. In turn I wasted only their money and their energy and my life’s valuable time. When they are most need of moral support and money I can’t able to provide neither as am jobless. This is where I stand. My history is useless. But I always remember a quote “everything happen for a reason.” As my parents undergone health issues then only I realized that they are aging. Life is short lived and I know understand what is important to my life. Now the lessons I learn from my parents is the only hope to me . They are always been a good example to others. My dad and mom never quits anything, if they started any task they will not take rest until they achieve it. My dad is an artist , I too can draw well but my creativity is in nil percent. He also knows the electrical works that he learn by himself. Mostly he spends more money for us like anything. My mom is also much talented. She never denies her life duty. She is a great book reader and a teacher. Their students love and respect her. My parents are self-learner and have done only good things to others in their life. But am none to near by their spirit and activeness, am just simply a moving tortoise.  I just came to know that
efforts will not be driven by somewhere to us , it has to be exhibit within oneself.
God has given me everything , only I have to open my eyes and see how beautiful the life has to be and to work on with determination and will power. The first step is to bring my motives for a good and then to multiple in a right way. Now I conceal my heart to forgive myself and accept as who am for and organize all my strength and efforts to lead a responsible life.
Mistakes are common in nature but when we keep on doing it not bothering about its lesson then it will leave an unchangeable mark in our life. So we have to always analysis what is good to us and what is important to our life and to our dear ones.

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